Since the mid-twentieth century, society has recognized that kids have plenty to contribute besides dutiful obedience, and that there's a difference between disrespect for parents and open-minded questioning of "the way things are done." The ideal family arrangement allows everyone to contribute to the fullest, with the head(s) of household filling a coaching and supervisory role.
Here are some hints for building a collaborative household:
Beware dismissing a suggestion as "impractical" just because it never occurred to you. Young minds, unconditioned by decades of "this is normal" input, can often see options and problems that adults can't. When you get a suggestion, pause long enough to seriously consider it. If the idea proves a good one, remember to give congratulations and credit to the originator.
Of course, some suggestions really are impractical. When a child asks for something you aren't sure about-or something you're sure is a bad idea-ask her to explain the reasons behind her request: "What will this really accomplish? How would other people feel? What else might achieve this objective?" Whatever the eventual decision, your child will get useful practice in critical thinking.
There are three categories of household activity where someone too often gets shortchanged:
If you have multiple children, you want them to see each other as teammates rather than opponents. The best rivalry-preventative measures: